The husband is out of town for a brief work trip, which always makes for a stressful situation. And I'm hard-core sticking with Weight Watchers right now, because, dammit, I'm worth it. So, with the stress and the limited eating opportunities, I have decided that I'm going to take time to just sit and relax during meals. I have promised myself I will sit with my lunch and watch an entire half-hour of TV. (Shameful confession: Nathan is upstairs eating his meal in front of the TV, too.)
So far I'm two days into the TV plan, and you know what I've discovered?
Daytime TV is crap.
Now, this is not such a big concern in this day and age of DVRs, but at this point in the year there's nothing new or exciting recorded. So I watch what's on.
Yesterday I caught up with a classic, TLC's A Baby Story. I don't know why I've watched so many episodes of the show, because every moment of it is painful and stupid. The first third where they follow the couple around their pre-baby lives is dumb and pointless. I don't care about these people or their baby showers or their nursery decor or the grandparents-to-be who are so excited about this baby (shocker). The actual birth part is also very unpleasant to watch. And then there's the concluding segment, where they go and interview the parents about how their lives are going a month or two after the baby is born.
Because you know what? "Life since So-and-So was born has been such unbelievable joy." Their lives are now complete. Husband is a wonderful father and Wife is a wonderful mother, and they can't wait to have at least 5 more children. Inevitably the baby is a "good baby" with a mellow personality who is so much fun.
Now, I get it. Nobody wants to watch a big downer of a show where the parents tell it like it really is. And, of course, there is some truth to what they're saying, sugar-coated as it is. We all love our kids. As much as a child throws a wrench in your life, you still can't imagine life without him/her.
But, come on. You've just spent a month where your hormones are going wild, and you've suddenly been forced into the reality that your life is no longer going to be about you, ever. You're beholden to an irrational, frequently-waking, frequently-eating, frequently-pooping little creature who, indeed, can't really do anything except eat, sleep, poop, and cry.
And, again, I know. Bundle of joy. All-consuming love. Wouldn't trade it for the world. We all get it. But wouldn't the stay-at-home moms watching this show really appreciate one segment of A Baby Story where the new parents say something like, "Shit, this has been the longest month of my life. This creature is like trying to care for a giant Gigapet on acid"?
I know I would.
So, fuming at the unreality of A Baby Story, today I decided to flip around the channels a little.
And did you know there's a channel called MOMS? Do you know how ridiculous I felt watching The Mom Channel during my alleged lunch break?
It's sort of like one of those channels that is one big infomercial. The particular "show" I watched was called something like "Dinner Solutions." Well, I need dinner solutions, I thought. I'm currently trying to create meals that will accommodate my Weight Watchering, a preschool who doesn't eat anything, and a husband who barely likes more than the preschooler.
The show was sponsored by Ragu. Did you get that? RAGU. If you didn't hear that, they mention it several more times, in little ads interspersed between the moms talking, and in a constant ad placed at the bottom of the screen. Ragu, Ragu, Ragu.
Anyway, the "show" just interviewed a bunch of mom bloggers. Which I guess was kind of cool for those mom bloggers, that they've made it big (well, medium) and all. But all this show was, was moms making me again feel bad about myself.
My kids love vegetables! I make up a game to get them to eat their food! We would never watch TV during dinner! Dinner time is family time!
Actually, the whole Dinner time is family time thing was echoed by viewer quotes put on the channel's Facebook page. A few moms got on there and copped to leaving the TV on during dinner, but of course the goody-goodies are going to be the ones to tell you all about how much better they are than you are.
Just another way to feel inferior. Next week I switch to soap operas.